No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
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