member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
