can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Randomize