When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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