I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
This is the high leading the old right now
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
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