I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Randomize
