So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
im about as happy as oj after his trial
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
