Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
