Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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