you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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