He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
