But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
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