Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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