i jhust puked up my retainher.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Randomize