let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize