The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
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