Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
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