I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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