Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
