I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
