Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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