Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
