careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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