We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
