Texts From Last Night

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  (540): View more from Virginia

  Whore.

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I was being facetious

  (540): View more from Virginia

  Don't try to hide behind big words.

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  (540): Whore. (832): I was being facetious (540): Don't try to hide behind big words. http://tfl.nu/w180
  Replies (2) Good night (2250) Bad night (766)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS

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  (617): theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS http://tfl.nu/np1i
  Replies (235) Good night (3490) Bad night (4353)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  Tell me the dirtiest joke you know

  (1-907): View more from Alaska

  Sarah Palin

  (907): View more from Alaska

  god, I love you

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  (907): Tell me the dirtiest joke you know (1-907): Sarah Palin (907): god, I love you http://tfl.nu/fmd4
  Replies (101) Good night (10719) Bad night (1464)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..

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  (309): Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around.. http://tfl.nu/cqm4
  Replies (4) Good night (2646) Bad night (1053)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project

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  (818): I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project http://tfl.nu/g4w5
  Replies (6) Good night (2747) Bad night (1303)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.

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  (630): I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode. http://tfl.nu/h8l8
  Replies (11) Good night (3143) Bad night (804)
• Favorite

  (260): View more from Indiana

  A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?

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  (260): A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake? http://tfl.nu/02wx
  Replies (7) Good night (1933) Bad night (608)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)

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  (774): I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-) http://tfl.nu/aq14
  Replies (8) Good night (1643) Bad night (653)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.

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  (850): You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster. http://tfl.nu/k8oo
  Replies (2) Good night (1412) Bad night (416)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.

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  (727): It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside. http://tfl.nu/ic5n
  Replies (5) Good night (699) Bad night (433)
• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)

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  (319): So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know) http://tfl.nu/6617
  Replies (1) Good night (394) Bad night (253)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.

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  (775): He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count. http://tfl.nu/iytw
  Replies (2) Good night (241) Bad night (593)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.

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  (905): I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone. http://tfl.nu/lxal
  Replies (1) Good night (451) Bad night (171)
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.

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  (269): You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone. http://tfl.nu/l2io
  Replies (0) Good night (238) Bad night (288)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?

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  (859): Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"? http://tfl.nu/ijad
  Replies (8) Good night (480) Bad night (147)

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