I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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