my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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