Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
