One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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