You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
