I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
