I wish I could teleport
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
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