We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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