Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
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