We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
only you would photoshop your dick
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
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