I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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