we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Ladies don't puke and tell
Randomize