Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
