My brain says no but my pants say off.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
