One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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