I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
