Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
