butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
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