in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize