It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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