do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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