she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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