I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
