So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize