Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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