i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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